Today while watching Oprah I had an epiphany...The last time I was consistently happy in life was when i was about 12-13. Then i realized that was about a decade ago! What brought about my epiphany was watching the backstreet boys perform again! Yes, I loved them and singing their songs makes me feel like that 13 year old girl again. Now i wasn't that screaming fan who cried whenever they were on tv. I just quietly liked them (especially kevin) and new all the words to all their songs! My depression started in 7th grade along with my migraines and i never addressed the issues until now. I can't help but think i've wasted so much of my youth and the "good old days" people always talk about, being depressed. I have definitely had some happy moments in there that I wouldn't trade for the world but I haven't been consistently happy like that in 10 years! Is it because i was a kid and life was bliss? I don't know, but it was a slap in the face!
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